4. Superman
He’s the guy you call when you need help and you’ve exhausted all your options. He may not have heard of your Kickstarter campaign or know why you need another 1,000 signatures on your petition, but somehow he always manages to get there at the last minute and knows just how to save you. His powers seem otherworldly, and you have no idea how he’s able to do it, but time and again you’ve seen him come to the rescue and help get the word out for worthy causes. He’s even helped find lost pets!
If only he didn’t have to blog about every single one of his exploits immediately afterwards!
3. Wonder Woman
This is a man’s world, and she is determined to prove it. She’s constantly posting feminist rhetoric, and always insists on uncovering the “true story”, never taking anything at face value. Even when a news item seems to have nothing to do with gender issues on the surface, she finds a way to spin it and turn it into more ammunition in her war against men. She always manages to put the squeeze on her victims and gets them to admit everything she wants to hear.
2. Flash
Always first on the scene, and always has to prove it. He’s sent out links to more of his successful “F1RST!!!!” posts than anything else. It’s like a compulsion. But, then again, he is always the first person to hear about the next big thing. Unfortunately, by the time you’ve caught up, he’s already moved on to something else. He’s just too quick for you.
1. Green Lantern
The architect and designer. He doesn’t just use the internet, he changes it. Anything he imagines seems to just spring up. He’s created more websites than you can count, and they’re all actually pretty cool. He’s a pro at HTML, CSS, Photoshop, and those are just the things you understand. He’ll be on a roll for 24 hours before he needs to recharge, but then you know he’ll just be back at it again, turning everything he can imagine into a reality.
Did any of these internet superheroes sound like someone you know? Or maybe even you? Sound off in the comments!
